Why We Created Keswick’s First Alcohol-Free Bar | Our Story

The Lake District’s First Dedicated Alcohol-Free Bar & Cafe

In the Caribbean, chaos unfolds as monkeys, introduced centuries ago, have developed a unique taste for alcohol, frequently getting drunk, pilfering drinks from unsuspecting holiday makers and running riot on the beaches. We will have... No Monkey Business in here!

Discover a new way to socialise in the heart of Keswick. At No Monkey Business, we’ve ditched the alcohol but kept the spirit. Whether you're a hiker looking for a post-fell refresh, a designated driver, or simply living the sober-curious life, we offer a sophisticated drinking experience without the morning-after regrets.

Beyond the "Mocktail": Our Zero-Proof Philosophy

Forget the standard sugary juices. We specialise in complex, adult flavours using the world’s finest non-alcoholic spirits and craft techniques.

Signature Zero-Proof Cocktails: From our zesty functional Electric Cosmo, infused with “Livener” botanicals to energise and stimulate the mind and get the party started, to our refreshing Vibey Iced Tea, an alcohol-free twist on a British classic that blends the bittersweet, mood-boosting “Social” elixir with chilled hibiscus tea and a zesty ginger ale finish. 

Our mixologists use premium botanicals to ensure your drink packs a punch, not a hangover.

Mood-Boosting Elixirs: Experience our unique range of functional drinks. We incorporate natural adaptogens like Ashwagandha and Reishi mushroom, along with nootropics designed to help you relax, focus, and feel good naturally.

Craft 0% Beers & Low-ABV Wines: We’ve hand-selected the best alcohol-free craft brews and crisp wines that actually taste like the real thing.

From Morning Lattes to Evening Vibes

No Monkey Business transitions seamlessly from your favourite morning coffee spot to Keswick’s coolest evening hangout.

The Coffee Lab: We proudly serve Ozone Coffee and speciality lattes. Don't miss our signature Turmeric Latte—the perfect anti-inflammatory boost after a walk up Catbells. Need a pick-me-up? Fuel your mind and body with our high-grade functional nootropic coffee infused with potent medicinal mushrooms and adaptogens. Crafted to deliver a natural, jitter-free energy boost without the crash, you can choose from four custom blends—Flow, Mojo, Mush Love, or Zen—to clear brain fog, lower cortisol, or unlock your peak flow state

Mindful Pairing: Our drinks are designed to complement our food menu. Pair a crisp 0% IPA with our Chicken Caesar Flatbread or enjoy a botanical elixir alongside our Brunch favourites like our Shakshuka Croissant and French Toast.

Why Visit No Monkey Business in Keswick?

Inclusive Atmosphere: A welcoming space for walkers, families, locals, and dogs!

Health & Wellness: Focused on mindful drinking and functional ingredients that support your lifestyle.

Prime Location: Located right on Main Street, we are the perfect pit-stop before or after your Lake District adventures.